The Arrival Fallacy

written by JOSH GESSNER | The Learning Engine

Today at a Glance:

• The Arrival Fallacy

• Have you fallen into its trap?

• These are your ‘Golden Years’

We spend our whole lives playing a dangerous game:

“I can’t wait until I achieve X so I can..."

“I can’t wait until I achieve Y so I can..."

“I can’t wait until I achieve Z so I can..."

When you achieve one goal, you reset to the next one.

The point:

You’ve already achieved goals that you said would make you happy.

Yet you keep repeating the cycle.

This is the Arrival Fallacy.

It's natural.

Our brain is wired this way.

When we achieve a goal, we're met with initial delight:

Only to reset to the baseline, and wonder what comes next.

I started to think about this more when I reflect on my life:

• What goals am I pursuing?

• Do I actually enjoy the process of working toward that goal?

• Would I still do it even if I knew I will never achieve the goal?

As Naval Ravikant famously said:

"Desire is a contract you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want. "

Am I harboring unhappiness for an end goal that may never arrive?

It's scary when it's framed like this.

It goes against everything we thought was true:

"Achieve X and you'll have lasting happiness."

Can you break free?

Tool 1) "These are the Golden Years"

How many times have you looked back and cherished the moments in the past?

I know I have.

The days with the most suffering are the ones I’m most grateful for.

In 1 year you won't remember the texture of your mind.

• Worries

• Boredom

• Anxieties

But by fixating on these, we are:

Sacrificing the present moment, for a problem that won't matter in the future.

If we can take a step back and remind ourselves:

"These are the golden years",

We can break free from the Arrival Fallacy and enjoy the present moment.

Tool 2) Choose your suffering

Every goal requires work, pain and suffering.

So why not choose our suffering?

How?

By choosing a pursuit that we’re willing to suffer for.

These 2 tools have helped me:

• Enjoy moments throughout the day

• Be more committed to the work required

• Choose the right goals to pursue

The Arrival Fallacy keeps us pushing for higher levels of achievement.

But it can also take us away from enjoying the limited time we have.

Main Lesson:

You've already achieved goals that you said would make you happy.

The Arrival Fallacy changed my life.

I hope it sparks you to think about yours.